Fort Schmerzen

From DYOS Wiki
(Redirected from Battle of Fort Schmerzen)
Jump to: navigation, search

Fort Schmerzen was an abandoned Second World War German bunker located on the Siegfried Line of World War I.[1] With its exact location lost during the Soviet blockade of Berlin during the Cold War, Schmerzen provided the perfect refuge for Combine forces after the fall of the New Avatar Order.[2] Schmerzen was the site of the eponymous battle between a joint strike force assembled by the Republic of Coruscant, Free Western Army, and Mr. Toyoda's forces against the Combine Empire and remnant Napoleonic guerrillas that heralded the end of the Combine Insurgency.

Battle of Fort Schmerzen

Battle of Fort Schmerzen
Part of the Combine Insurgency
CivGeneral and Co. before storming the bunker
Date 13 January – 1 February 2009
Location Fort Schmerzen, Germany
Result Allied decisive victory;
Combine routed from Earth
Commanders and leaders


While catering to his cinematic interests in Berlin, Mr. Toyoda was kidnapped by General Grievous,[3] who attempted to debrief him. Toyoda had hidden the soul of Thunderfall during the Avatar Wars, denying kulade the sysadmin's god-like powers. Grievous tried to threaten, then reason information out of him, subjecting him to a series of often violent interrogations under the growing impatience of Dr. Breen.[4] Concerned that Grievous would be able to extract the information and deliver kulade from the Land of Hiatus, CivGeneral led a salient to rescue Toyoda.

Meanwhile, Spongebob Squarepants was assigned to the Free Western division tasked with rescuing Timmy Turner, Cosmo and Wanda.[5] He and bestest friend for ever Patrick Star encountered their other bestest friend Sandy Cheeks, the division's commanding officer.[6]

Playing field

The Coruscanti strike force, in conjunction with Toyoda's personnel present in Germany, worked to contain the Combine armies around the bunker. The Free Western Army, meanwhile, concerned itself with leftover Napoleonic armoured units led by Oberst von Cruisenburg.

With a strike squad under the command of Lieutenant Ishikawa distracting the surface guards[7], Our Heroes penetrated the bunker, where they discovered the Combine to be conducting scientific experiments of questionable ethical foundation.[8] Grievous, meanwhile, was told Toyoda had finally capitulated. Toyoda proceeded to explain to Grievous the nature of his involvement in the Avatar Wars. Grievous did not believe he had been told how Thunderfall was saved, to which Toyoda replied: "I told you I would talk. Evidently, you didn't listen."[9]

At that point, CivGeneral and Co. penetrated the last level of the bunker, and Grievous disappeared. Toyoda was rescued, and the party pursued the mercenary into the main control room, where Grievous unleashed another freak of privatized science against them. With Toyoda emerging defiant to the end, Grievous snapped, and against Breen's directive, attempted to kill him. CivGeneral reacted quickly, throwing Toyoda a lightsaber with which he managed to best his attacker. Toyoda then foresook his personal safety and offered Grievous the chance for a fresh start. Grievous, either out of pride or guilt, committed suicide.[10]


The primary objective accomplished, the Coruscantis exited the region and returned to a Bundeswehr bivouac outside Berlin.[11] The Free Western Army was left to battle von Cruisenburg's force alone, and discovered that the fairies had already been relocated. They also discovered that von Cruisenburg had adopted kamikaze tactics, wiring his entire battalion to a timed detonator. His plan backfired with the timely arrival of a Supermarine Spitfire that exfiltrated Our Other Heroes from von Cruisenburg's Landkreuzer P. 1000 Ratte seconds before detonation.[12]

See also