Eastern Union

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"EU" redirects here. For the economic alliance, see European Union.
Eastern Union

"Maybe a sideways 'T', for Thorvald?"
something something cultural mosaic
Coat of arms
Location of the Eastern Union
CapitalOslo (cultural)
Moscow (administrative)
Largest cityMoscow
Official languagesNorwegian, Swedish, Finnish, Ukrainian, Russian, Estonian, Lithuanian, Latvian, Belorussian, Polish, Czech, Slovak, Georgian, Kazakh, Moldovan, Romanian, Serbian, Danish[1]
No state religion
GovernmentTotalitarian /
Federal Republic
• Head of State
Thorvald of Lym
LegislatureUnion Legislature
Member statesList of member states
Kingdom of Denmark constituentsFaroe Islands, Greenland
Treaty Protectorates
  • Austria
  • Hungary
  • Slovenia
  • Croatia
  • Bosnia & Herzegovina
  • Montenegro
  • Bulgaria
  • Kosovo
  • Macedonia
  • Albania
France, Germany, Greece
National hero(es)Marshal Maxim Brusilov
22 October 2006
• DYOS 8
3 May 2007
• DYOS 9
26 August 2007
National animalGrey Wolf
Drives on theright[3]

The Eastern Union is a supernational federation comprising several nations situated in Eastern Europe[4] and other former Soviet Socialist Republics. The Union was established in a bloodless coup on 22 October, 2006, after the Ukrainian army, under direction from the Norse nobleman Thorvald of Lym, invaded Russia.

The Union served throughout the Post-DYOS 5 Era as Thorvald's extended muscle and opportunity for social satire. With the political atmosphere growing increasingly pronounced in DRAW Your Own Story 10 and later, and with Thorvald in the company of CivGeneral on a near-constant basis, the Union took on a more independent role in the comics. Individual characters such as Marshal Brusilov and Generals Koldanev and Czciborycz were elevated to prominence within the story, frequently dictating federal policy on Thorvald's behalf.

The Eastern Union was a goodwill ally of the Republic of Coruscant ever since the Brazilian Campaign in DYOS 6, and following the Second Napoleonic War in DYOS 10 became joint hegemon of Europe alongside its wartime ally the Free Western Army. During the Third Nazi War, these three powers joined together in a new world order dubbed the Triple Entente.


The government of the Eastern Union, while technically autocratic, most strongly resembles a federal republic. While each nation retains its own separate governmental body and general autonomy, the supreme federal government, known as the Union Legislature, oversees the management of the federation as a whole, and is responsible for major international dealings and establishing governmental standards that the countries are encouraged to strive towards.

The Union Legislature is notorious for a sprawling bureaucracy and tightly regimented administrative hierarchy. Numerous departments allegedly cover every conceivable field of management, from how many fish inhabit the Aral Sea to the current number of paper clips on Ulrik's desk[5]. Although bloated, it also ensures Union citizens will always find employment. The lower rungs endure trivial and often redundant work with long breaks in between; a common scare tactic amongst parents whose children misbehave is to threaten them with a job in the government.

The Eastern Union is currently headed by its founder, Thorvald of Lym. He is effectively dictator of the federation, holding the official title of Supreme Prime Minister for Life. Despite this omnipotent position, he rarely makes decisions without consulting a bureau of advisors beforehand, his "most trusted advisor" and de facto second-in-command being his good friend Bjørn.


The Eastern Union follows a strange hybrid of Keynesianism, market socialism, and in some cases quasi-communist economic policy that advocates a flexible market environment while retaining the right to heavy State intervention as deemed appropriate. A slower-than-average annual growth rate is countered by claims of greater overall stability and robustness in the face of sudden market fluctuations. State interventionism is defended as paramount to ensuring the equal distribution of "necessities"[6] during periods of particular economic stress, touted by the government as a return to the theory of the "moral economy".

The viability of this system has been debated by economists, but evidently it works since Western Europe invests and The Market Is Always Right. There have also been suggestions that like Orks, Thorvald possesses a passive psychic ability and the market works because he wills it to work.[7]

Armed forces

The military of the Eastern Union is an amalgamation of the armies of its member states. Although the numerous divisions are subject to a central command, in practical terms they remain decentralized and heterogeneous, subject to their home countries first and Union administration when called upon.[8] This practice has been criticized for needlessly hampering the army's ability to respond to emergencies, and the "potential train wreck" in co-ordination efficiency has been cited as the cause of the military's poor initial performance in the Second Napoleonic War.[9]

The Union Armed Forces are reputed for their diversity.

Conversely, military doctrine has been standardized by integrating member states' training policies and operational procedures into a coherent "best of the best". As a result, the armed forces adhere to a high standard of training, and as individual units operate with exceptional quality.[10]

The peace-time standing strength of the armed forces is estimated between 1,648,334 and 1,923,183 personnel. Under full mobilization, the Union is believed to be capable of mustering over seven million troops, with paramilitaries providing nearly 25 million combat personnel total.[11]

Foreign relations

The Eastern Union holds Russia's permanent seat on the United Nations Security Council, but treats the accompanying veto power as an exercise in the collective voice of the Union's member states. As such, the veto is only applied if all eighteen nations are in consensus; otherwise, Russia will abstain from the final vote.[12]

The Eastern Union has endeavoured to cordial relations with Europe and the general benefit of humanity around the world. The Union contributes generously to the United Nations budget and manpower for peacekeeping missions, and frequently routes its international negotiations through the General Assembly. The Union maintains a friendly stance with the Free Western Army, although Timmy Turner's invasion of Australia has generated concern amongst members of parliament.[13]

The Eastern Union was subject to intense international scrutiny following the invasion of Canada, its first openly aggressive war. The occupying junta, acutely sensitive to its situation, has endeavoured to promote the occupation as conforming to humanitarian ideals.[14] A major step toward healing relations between Canada and the Union was realized when the Union honoured the deceased resistance leader Captain2 with a state funeral in Moscow.

The Republic of Coruscant looks favourably upon the Eastern Union, and the two powers were party to an informal alliance predating the Triple Entente. While the Union has frequently received military aid from the Coruscantis,[15] how effective Union reciprocation can be with a limited spacefleet[16] is debatable.

See also


  1. Now imagine trying to figure out a demonym!
  2. Not literally, of course.
  3. When sober
  4. Including Poland
  5. 378.
  6. OC-3072 INTERNET!!!
  7. You will now bring Thorvald a cookie.
  8. They do not even have a standard uniform or armament pattern.
  9. miniluv malquoted refs unpersons doubleplusungood minitru rectify fullwise
  10. Whaddaya mean it's not awesome?
  11. Calculated from Wikipedia
  12. Likewise, consensus is required for a Russian 'yea'.
  13. I wouldn't need all these footnotes if I took the time to actually write the article.
  14. For example, they ousted Harper.
  15. Combine Insurgency, and so forth
  16. i.e. three longships