Pripyat Skirmish
| Pripyat Skirmish | |||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 225px Distribution of forces before and after | |||||
| |||||
| Belligerents | |||||
 Barbarians | Kingdom of Lym | ||||
| Commanders and leaders | |||||
|
Barbarian Leader | Thorvald of Lym | ||||
The Pripyat Skirmish occurred 17 October 2006. The Republic of Coruscant and Kingdom of Lym fought off a barbarian horde on the Pripyat River near Chornobyl, Ukraine.
Background
Thorvald's attack against Kan' Sharuminar unwittingly triggered the mutual defence agreement between Kan and CivGeneral. In preparation for the Coruscanti retaliation, Thorvald sailed the Golden Fleet to Ukraine in the hope of garnishing military support. A starfleet under the joint command of Admirals Ozzel and Piett caught up with the Norsemen on the Pripyat river near Chornobyl. Thorvald stalled the Coruscantis with bribes of olive oil as he scrambled to develop an exit strategy.
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As the opposing forces waited for a reply back from CivGeneral, they were suddenly attacked by a barbarian horde of fighter planes and naval cruisers. This prompted Ozzel to say in a rather loud voice: "Blast the rebel fighters out of the sky!! DO IT!! DO IT NOW!!!" Putting aside their ideological differences, the two armies fought together to defend their common ego.
Vintage footage
Stop this madness
- "You told me this would not happen! No matter how many we kill, they keep coming!"
— Josef Stalin on Jehovah's Witnesses
Waves of fighters continued to spawn. Despite the Coruscantis' best efforts, the deflector shield on Piett's command ship was disabled, and a kamikaze pilot flew into the bridge à la Return of the Jedi. Thorvald became so peeved by it all that he began ranting some half-arsed speech about moral obligations, and Bjørn hacked the Civilization II source code to undo everything, rendering all the preceding events irrelevant.
Aftermath
Despite the whole episode, Thorvald's standing with the Coruscantis changed little at the immediate time. With rising militarism on the part of Mjcommie, the fleet released the Norsemen since they were not a priority target, and Thorvald's aggression against Kan gradually became a non-issue.
